Wedding Stress: A Broken Calm


11 days out, and we’re looking for a break in the storm.

Before I go much further, Paige and I have offered our thoughts and appropriate condolences to the people of Japan, primarily Kyoto, that were affected by Typhoon Man-Yi which forced hundreds of thousands of residents to evacuate their houses before the storm’s 3 inches an hour filled the streets with the swollen Katsura.

pb-130916-japan-da-05.photoblog900(Image: Kyodo News via NBC News)

Considering the aftermath of the typhoon, I would ask you to understand that Paige and I offered to help in any way we could once we arrived in Japan, and the stress that I refer to from here on is no reflection on how we feel about the community in Kyoto, but rather simple frustration with ourselves for not developing a back up plan.


Our frustration began with the invitations that we sent out. All of the addresses had been handwritten to express how much each person meant to us, thinking that penmanship and hard work would be appreciated by our closest friends. The problem though, came from the wonderful US Postal Service. Apparently, cursive is a one-way ticket to postal purgatory, and we now have about 70 invitations floating around the US with a final headcount due to our venue today.

As you can probably assume, this debacle has been no cup of tea. Our strongest source of comfort, until last week, was Japan. Our flights were taken care of, reservations made at a beautiful resort along the river in Kyoto, and time to relax away from everything.

Friday night however, our contact with Hoshinoya Kyoto emailed us to let us know that the damage caused by the typhoon has closed the resort for the duration of the year. Again, we responded with concern for the well-being of the staff and the community, but in the humble nature of our host, the resort encouraged us to look at other options and to focus on our honeymoon.

To put that in perspective, our honeymoon which has been planned for two months, was literally washed away in a night, with two weeks until we would be heading to a country with a language we are struggling to learn, in addition to the invitation debacle we are trying to work through. Given the challenges, I was told this adage:

The rockier the wedding, the stronger the marriage.

I feel, at this point, that we’re building a house on stone, where the shifting sands of time will be hard-pressed in disturbing the foundation we’ve been building the last four years.

In the end, we can’t wait for the wedding. Our closest friends have all reminded us how much we are loved and how strong their faith is in our future, and we couldn’t be more grateful for it. Japan will be an adventure, despite the ironic shift of our honeymoon from calm to the storm that it was preluding.

As a final piece of advice, keep your wedding small, invite the people that really matter, and have fun. When the unexpected happens, roll with it, and make the best of every situation.


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